When Mdm Chung was first admitted to St Luke’s Hospital (SLH), she quietly said, “I want to die.”
Living with advanced Alzheimer’s disease had gradually changed many aspects of her life. Her memory had faded, communication had become difficult, and she had withdrawn from those around her. Her sleep-wake cycle had also reversed, while dysphagia affected her food intake.
To her daughter, Madeline, this was not the mother she had known. Once strong-willed and fiercely independent, Mdm Chung had always been the pillar of the family. Watching dementia slowly change her personality was one of the hardest parts of being a caregiver.
An accident at home left Mdm Chung with severe wounds on both legs after one became trapped between the bed railings. The wounds deteriorated, eventually requiring hospitalisation and specialised wound care.
“When Mdm Chung was admitted, she had complex, non-healing wounds on both legs, including a deep wound with exposed tendons on her right leg and an eschar wound on her left,” recalled Nurse Manager Sr Jasmine. “Alongside regular wound care, our multidisciplinary team worked closely together to support her recovery. By addressing not only her wounds, but also her nutrition and emotional wellbeing, we gradually saw the wounds progress from non-healing to healing, with some areas recovering completely. Most importantly, her comfort and quality of life improved along the way.”
In those early days, the 96-year-old remained withdrawn and difficult to reach.
Each morning, Family Physician Dr Yii Zheng-Wei greeted her warmly. Her reply was almost always the same.
“Good night.”
To her family, it was her way of ending the conversation.
But Dr Yii never rushed her. Instead, he continued returning each day with the same gentle greeting.
Slowly, things began to change.
She started responding to his cheerful “Good morning” with a nod. Then came the occasional smile. Eventually, there were even brief jokes and moments of humour — remarkable for someone who had once seemed unreachable.
Her low mood, together with her difficulties swallowing, also affected her appetite. As she ate less, she lost weight, slowing her wound healing.
Senior Dietitian Grace worked closely with Madeline to understand the foods that still brought Mdm Chung comfort, while supporting her nutritional needs in view of her dysphagia. Learning of her fondness for braised pork and soups, Grace incorporated familiar flavours into her nutrition plan.
Madeline played her part too. Every visit, she prepared braised pork, carefully mixing the sauce into porridge so her mother could continue enjoying the foods she loved. Over three months, Mdm Chung gained 4kg, and her wounds gradually healed.
Care extended beyond the bedside.
As Mdm Chung had been bedridden for the past three years, with her legs curled up and unable to straighten fully, Occupational Therapist Esther arranged for her to be hoisted into a specialised wheelchair. This allowed her to enjoy fresh air downstairs, visits to the nearby market, and occasional moments in the garden with sunshine and ice cream.
Physiotherapist Zhi Yun also supported her comfort through gentle therapy for her stiff arms and fingers. Small projected stars on the ceiling created a calming atmosphere in her room.
For Madeline, these thoughtful gestures meant a great deal. Her mother was not only cared for in bed, but was still able to experience comfort, connection and small moments of joy.
Madeline describes Nurse Manager Sr Jasmine as “an angel”. Nurses cared for her mother with gentleness and consistency. Medical Social Worker Amanda helped the family navigate financial assistance, while Grace continued supporting Mdm Chung’s nutritional needs. Dr Yii remained a reassuring presence throughout, and even Patient Service Assistant Jean brought warmth and laughter to difficult days.
After years of caring for her mother largely on her own, Madeline found comfort in knowing there was now a team walking alongside her.
Then came a special milestone — Mdm Chung’s 97th birthday.
Doctors, nurses, allied health professionals and family gathered around a birthday cake to celebrate the woman who had once arrived saying, “I want to die.”
The celebration captured everything her mother’s stay at SLH had come to represent. The staff knew Mdm Chung not only by her diagnosis, but by her favourite foods, her routines and the little things that still brought her comfort.
Mdm Chung was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease in 2018. As her condition progressed, Madeline gradually became her mother’s primary caregiver, eventually leaving her full-time job to care for her.
“I just want to walk this one last journey with her,” she shared.
Even now, although her mother no longer responds as she once did, Madeline gently combs her mother’s hair, speaks to her softly and always gives her a kiss before leaving.
Looking back, she hopes more people will understand that dementia is real and that caregiving is not a journey anyone should have to face alone.
“Caregiving isn’t easy,” she reflected.
What stays with her most is not only her mother’s recovery, but the dignity with which she was cared for each day. Even as dementia gradually took away her memories and her voice, the team at SLH never stopped seeing the person she had always been.
For Madeline, the care her mother received was a reminder that even in the most difficult seasons, no one should have to walk the journey alone.
